My mom used to say it was harder to raise grown kids than little ones. I did not understand it back then but I do now. Your grown kids can tear your heart out or make you pull your hair out. Or both. It seemed so difficult when my children were small to think that this was true but now I can see what she was saying.
My heart feels like it is breaking. I want to laugh and cry at the same time. I only trust that God will take care of the problems we are having. It will be in his timing. I can only hold on and keep on going. It is hard to be this open. I just hope this helps someone else that is going through something similar. You are not alone.